Finding Energy

So this self-discovery-creative-digging-what-the-heck-do-I-want-to-do-with-my-life journey I am on is a slow one, at best.  I often run into road blocks (real and imagined).  Part of building the foundation to figure out what I want to do in my life comes from answering what my passions are, what I get energy from, what moves me.  Yesterday, I truly felt energized by something.  Now, I have no idea if/how this plays a part in my future, but I thought I would grasp it anyway and make a note. 

A friend invited me over to help her think about what projects she wants to tackle in her home to make it her own.  She will be divorced soon and it is important to take control of this area of her life and love the space she's in.  I so enjoyed walking through her already lovely home and helping her start a couple of lists -- things to tackle soon, and things to save for and accomplish over time.  What fun we had talking about paint colors, furniture movement, and other little improvements or changes to her space!

I found such energy in that one afternoon, that I had a hard time sleeping last night.  So, I decided to post some photos of others' homes that I have helped transform.  This truly does energize me.

Mantras

Here are the Mantra "Trading Cards" I made....

Sharing my work

Not putting it off anymore...  Here are the pages I've been working on so far in class...

 

Pikes Peak -- chalk

 Setting Intentions -- chalk and markers

 Words and pictures that speak to me

 

25+ Things I Like to Do -- acrylic, pen, metallic gold acrylic on a wood ball rolled across the paper

 Watercolor with metallic gold acrylic on a wood ball rolled across the paper
 

Watercolor

Changing self-talk, Mantras -- crayon, marker, watercolor

25+ Things I WANT to Do -- Acrylic, playing with different textures

Acrylic on plastic produce netting with stamps made from silk leaves

Watercolor flowers made with kids' sponge brushes

Acrylic with plastic wrap stamping

Kids' dot painters with oil pastels

Scribbles with crayons and markers

Watercolors using various brushes, opposite hand, salt shake

Envelopes for 25 things -- watercolor, oil pastels

Letting Go of Perfect -- Acrylic using various applicators, overlay of torn paper w/ markers

Layering acrylics

Fingerpainting

Acrylics using toilet paper tubes

Acrylics

Acrylics with various applicators

Doodles

Watercolors using a straw

Oil pastel with torn paper watercolor overlays

More doodles

Freely drawn bunnies

Goals

Words from today given by by 13-year-old nephew:  

"Be productive in school and in life so you have time to do what you want. If you don't have anything to do, set some goals!"

So glad to have this kind of a kid for my boys to look up to.  Now, what about me?  He certainly got me thinking about my goals today.  I'd say my biggest goal was to be a mom.  Now I am and will be for the rest of my life.  So, I guess it is time to pick some new goals, right?  I don't know what they will be, but I'm excited right now to be focusing on me a bit while the kids are in school.  I sort of skipped the "me" part of my 20's.  Now, as I approach 40, I think it is ok to get back to that somewhat.  Time to make some goals!  This is a flaky post, but I'm tired, so off I go.  More pondering on this tomorrow...

Walk in Peace, Live in Love

I don't really know how this phrase came to me.  I do know how it came to me, though.  We were spending a week with my brother's family at their home, along with my parents.  They don't have a small house, but it was still tight quarters at times with 11 people hanging around.  And we really didn't go anywhere.  What I found was this mantra coming into my mind whenever frustrations began, tempers started to rise (or is it just my family that experiences these things?)  Repeating these words to myself helped me make it through.  Today, the words re-appeared in my mind.  There are some things and some people I've been struggling with lately.  I don't want to struggle.  I want to find peace.  To be positive.  To love.

Walk in peace, live in love....

Judgment Day

Ah... how I'm discovering that every day is Judgment Day for me.  By this I mean that *I* judge every day.  I judge myself.  I always feel like I'm not good enough, I'm not smart enough, and gosh darnit, nobody likes me (sorry, Stuart Smalley...)   And I think, though I'm so hesitant to admit this, I judge others.  I like to think I am not that person.  But sadly, I don't think I'm as accepting of others as I want to be.  Granted, I think maybe I'm better than some.  There I go again!  Judging, comparing, trying to measure up.  This is bad.  I want to change my thoughts.  I want to change my outlook.  I want to love, give light to the world, positive energy (oh how I love being around those people!!)...  This is going to take some work.  Really.  I think I might cry as I type this.  I don't want to judge others.  It is not for me to do.  But today, something struck me that it is ME that I cannot judge first.  I need to start with myself.  Love myself.  Give light to myself.  Think POSITIVE thoughts about myself.  And then I think the rest will come....  

Don't Judge Yourself.


In other news...  before all of this depth of realization, I was really enjoying my day. ;-)  Yes, it is going to keep being a good day because I am CHOOSING for it to be so!  But, back to how it started...  January 24th and I'm finally putting into practice several of my plans for myself this year.  Ok, not just for the year, but trying to do this going forward.  1) exercise 2) shower and dressed like a real person 3) make up on 4) take care of my body by using lotion, drinking lots of water, and having some ME time (yes, artistic creation was on the table literally(!) today, and next I'm going to read 5) Light a candle -- why do I have so many candles around if I'm not going to light them??? 6) Day 5 of my food cleanse and it is going well... just really missing chocolate...  I'm feeling really positive today and what a fantastic feeling that is!  Going to keep it moving!!

A quote I want to remember this year

THIS IS WHAT YOU SHALL DO ~ Live closer, every moment, to that thing that makes you sing; give when you can and help as you must; listen longer and speak less, speak more of healing, love and appreciation; recognize that you change the world when you serve in your community; forgive more and judge less; accept more and criticize less; be certain while embracing uncertainty; see todayÕs bad news as tomorrowÕs breakthrough and know if you live through it you will thrive; contribute to your own health and set aside justification; ring the bell at the top of your hill, squeeze the goodness out of your own harvest and pour your own cup full, first, and then fill all other cups. In these ways there will be room for the sweetness found in every day. ~ Mary Anne Radmacher